Melasma and the 8 Month Pregnant Lady at the Spa

16 11 2008

The spa was a mixed bag. It was really, really crowded – kind of ruined the serenity I was going for. I tried to push it away and still enjoy my day. My body scrub was okay – a man did it and he was mucho annoying. He kept talking and talking – about how cool his life was in CO when he lived there, blah, blah, blah. I was sort of weirded out about having a man do my scrub but I am pretty assertive so I would have freaked and called the police (mucho dramatic) if there had been any funny business. So he finally quit yapping when I stopped giving those socially polite grunts after he spoke.

The facial was a-m-a-zing. She “analyzed” my skin – I have fair skin, I never had any problems with acne and I am generally lucky in that department. But it was so weird – she was looking at it under the big magnifying glass and said that I had pigmentation around my mouth – I thought it was freckles that I had from being out in the sun this summer – but she said it was gynecological related pigmentation and asked if I was on the pill and/or had surges of hormones lately. I was like – WTF? So I looked it up this morning and it is called melasma or chloasma. I saw some pictures and mine is really minor, my DH says that he cannot even see it. The woman who did the facial said that there is not much to be done about it. Unless it gets worse after pregnancy (assuming I ever have one), I will probably leave it be. I am going to do more research on topical things I can do.

While we were getting ready for dinner in the spa’s locker room, this pretty woman who was visibly pregnant started chatting us up. She was pissed about how crowded it was, etc. etc. She managed to tell us that she was 8 months pregnant, we said congrats, etc. etc. She and I then started chatting about where she was from, blah, blah, blah. Of course, she then asked me if I had kids – I said no but that we were trying – that is it, but I should not have even said that much. She was like, “oh, just relax and it will happen, it is all about relaxing, this is my third one and it has been so easy – it’s like I think, I want to get pregnant and I get pregnant” Okay, so pretty annoying but she does not know me so I cannot take that personally – besides, she looked really cute and over the top pregnant – and then one of my friends says, “oh, yeah, Lisa, relax?”. Now that got me pissed – I think I overreacted because I do not think what my friend said translates into – you lost both pregnancies because you could not relax but that is what it felt like. I did not say a word – I am happy that I did not – because this morning I feel okay about it – I think my friend was just trying to be a cutesy part of the conversation. But – I will say that I used work all of the time and I used to be super intense about it. I then had a workaholic moment of clarity about 2 years ago and my life is much more balanced. My friend asked me later if I ever thought about taking a leave after a transfer – of course I have. For me, that would be much more stressful. That being said, I did take a week off last time for my ER and ET and I only worked half days for a week after that. The whole thing made me feel shitty and fed on my feelings of irrational guilt.

On a gluttony note, I ate so much last night I have a food hangover but it was really, really good.

My girlfriends got me a beautiful purple scarf, Chanel nail polish in “vamp” and tickets to go see Twilight this Saturday!




4 responses

16 11 2008

I always try to remember that people don’t mean to be hurtful when they say stupid things. Sometimes it is hard to look past it though.

I’m glad you had a relaxing day at the spa!

16 11 2008

1. you being anxious or stressed or a workaholic has NOT prevented you from getting prego. think of all of the people in the world who get pregnant…many of them are stressed or work hard
2. did you read the twillight books? i’m nervous for the movie. i hoping that it is good.
3. sorry the spa was weird. it should have just been totally relaxing….

16 11 2008

Sounds like the spa was a bit strange. Not exactly what you expect from a spa day…

People really don’t realize how much power their words have. I am sorry that happened.

Yay for Twilight. I can’t wait.

Thanks for your kind words!

18 11 2008

I’m frequently amazed at how callous and unaware fertile people can be. I can totally imagine that I would have wanted to hit her. It’s nice that you didn’t.

There’s no magic formula for this, Lisa. Even with the best possible combination of factors, it can still take many tries. I have done 6 cycles with this family. From those 6, we had one singleton and are pregnant with the twins now.

I won’t say be patient, because it’s asinine. But stay strong, treat yourself kindly, talk to other women experiencing what you are, and have faith.

I’ll hold some faith for you too.


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