24 Weeks; Reconciling Physical Misery with Emotional Bliss

4 12 2009

At the request of a few of you – here is a profile belly pic – I shot it from my cell phone two days ago in my office to send to my sister – yes, the girls are enormous too – when Mr. M lays his head next to me I marvel that one of my girls is as big as his head…

I cannot believe that I am 24 weeks – the threshold of viability – of course I want them to stay put for at least 12 more weeks – but wow, what an amazing place to be – I feel so damn lucky and completely blissed out.  

So, the battle of the acid continues – I have to say, I am not whining about this – I used to poo poo people (okay, my older sister) when they would complain about heartburn or reflux – but holy shit, let me tell you – this stuff is not for the faint of heart – the burning is unlike anything I have ever felt and the pain is pretty intense.

So, I called my doc the other day and they gave me zan.tac – instant migraine ensued.  I am not talking about some shitty, minor headache but a full blown, light sensitive, eye pulsing migraine.  I took three doses of the zantac, one in the am, one in the pm and one the next am – I thought I would continue until the headache went away because I had such anxiety about going to bed and not sleeping – but the headache was just too much.  

I was so paranoid about the headache that I was afraid it was pre.eclampsia and I drove to the local grocery store in my pjs and no bra (I know, look at the pic above – braless = obvious panic and desperation) to get a blood pressure reading from the machine next to the pharmacy and all was well – 115/67.  So, I was able to come home and watch christ.mas vacation with my stepson – Mr. M was at the movies with a friend – without envisioning horrible things.  

So, I may 1/2 the dose of zan.tac and only take it at night over the weekend and call them Monday to see how it goes.  I did sleep better the last two nights – although the first night on zan.tac was hard since I kept waking up from the headache pain.  (BTW – I have been sleeping sitting up, with a million pillows, have tried the couch, have tried only eating bland foods, etc. etc. etc.).

So – truly, my pregnancy has been about reconciling physical misery (hyperemises, acid reflux) with the emotional bliss and joy that I feel.  I have never once, not even a little, resented the pregnancy or resented what it is doing to me.  I would chop off a limb, shave my head, lose an eye, I WOULD DO ANYTHING for them and the physical part is just temporary and I love that I am able to take care of them and take care of me.

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13 responses

4 12 2009
LastChance

This post says it all–why you will be (and already are) a great mother. That sacrificial instinct is already there! Of course, one day you’ll try to use it to your advantage and hear yourself saying things like: “when I was pregnant with you I had to sleep sitting up…:” and those teenagers will roll their eyes but they’ll know know know how much they were loved from the get go. I hope the lowered dose does the trick, and your belly shot is adorable!

4 12 2009
Melissa G

Yuck, I’m so sorry the reflux is so bad, and a migraine on top of that?! Brutal…

Your last paragraph was lovely. I’m sure all mothers-to-be feel that way to an extent, but I think the IFer’s carry a little more depth to it. I’m so glad to hear you’re feeling better emotionally, I bet the 24 week mark takes a big weight off your shoulders.

CUTE belly pic!

4 12 2009
K

YAY for the 24 week mark! It’s a challenge to balance the physical discomfort with the emotional thrill (and guilt when you complain about physical discomfort). Anyways, 24 weeks, (viability!!!) is awesome! I can’t wait until I’m there too. Thanks for showing your belly bump. I’m no where near that but can’t wait!!!!

4 12 2009
Sarah

Love the belly pic! Can’t they give you something other than Zantac?

4 12 2009
mo

Of course you would do anything for them! Of course. I agree with DAVs that this is a sign that you are going to be a great mom. Sorry you’re still feeling so badly. Amazing to see the belly pic! incredible how much room those babies take up!! Hoping that you feel better soon.

Mo

4 12 2009
Maria

I just hated that feeling like my spit was firewater. How about some ice cream right before you go to bed? I think my nightly routine in the last few weeks consisted of a giant milkshake before bed 😉 Drinking milk all the time can cause constipation, but it worked well on the heartburn front.

4 12 2009
Andrea

You look great! I’m starting to get pretty uncomfortable myself, but at least I haven’t had the horrible reflux yet. I hope it goes away for you…that’s no fun! Congrats on 24 weeks!!!!!!!!!!!!

5 12 2009
Nikki

Look at you! You look great. I’m sorry the reflux has been so bad, but I’m so proud of you for taking it all in your stride. You will be (and already are) a great mom!

Congrats on viability!

5 12 2009
Amanda

Awe, I’m sorry your going through so much physical discomfort.

I also got really really bad heartburn when I was pregnant. Feels like a heartattack it hurt so bad.

I took Zantax 75 once a day when the heartburn was bad and it helped, it lasts for 12? or 24 hours so you don’t have to take too much. Ice Cream I found helps too, for immediate relief, but it’s not lasting. Also Gaviscon (liquid form) but again it’s only temporairy. Steer clear from foods that cause the heartburn (it’s different for everyone but many say it’s spicy foods, soda, coffee, tea, chocolate) and eat small little meals rather than big ones.

Good luck, over the half way mark, not much longer to go, and for sure seek out the doctor if that headache doesn’t go away.

CONGRATS on making 24 weeks, that’s a huge milestone and I just love your belly bump!

5 12 2009
Katie

I’m right there reconciling with you. Beautiful belly shot!

6 12 2009
Traci

Sorry to hear about the reflux->zantac->migraine nightmare. You’re a real trooper and I hope you’ll get much relief in 12 weeks. Love the belly shot and I think the boobage jokes are pretty funny. I think we’ll turn out like twinsies coz I was never small to begin with. Going to the store without a bra would have been quite a sight. I would love to have my camcorder on slo-mo to capture that one! Bow bow chica wow wow. 😉

6 12 2009
strongblonde

i’m hopeful that you are able to get comfortable. you’re already such a great mom and doing so much trying to keep everyone safe and healthy. 😉

and LOVE the belly pic!!

xoxo

11 12 2009
PJ

Hmmm… sorry I am just posting now. My Google Reader is exploding.

I’ve had acid reflux for a few years now, really bad. I even went to a GI doctor and tried to have an endoscopy, but I fought them in my sedated state and they didn’t do it. About a week before I had my retrieval it was pretty band and I decided that I needed to just have general anesthesia for the endoscopy to see what was going on, and then of course I got pregnant. So… it’ll be a long 7 months and then some…

I’ve been taking zantac for it though. I was kind of relieved that the OB’s NP didn’t even wince about it. I also take Tums when I need it. I had a really BAAAAAD episode last night, like where it combined with the nausea. I actually took the day off work today to recover.

Some tips you’ve probably already heard… elevate your head when sleeping (pillows), eat dinner early and watch out for anything too fatty, spicy, or acidic (tomato sauce kills me). I know, very boring!

Love the belly shot!

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