Sleep Deprivation and Public Shaming

6 11 2010

I have noticed some serious changes in my personality since Sugar and Spice were born.  They are the true joys of my life and they make me so happy, I live to be with them.  All of the other parts of my life have been a roller coaster and I really think it is from sleep deprivation.  I am an 8 hour minimum girl – if I do not get 8 solid hours, I am a beast.  Yes – the babies are sleeping well – from about 7:30 pm to 5ish am – so no complaints there. However, I wake up when I hear them and I do not and have not slept straight through the night in so, so long – the end of my pregnancy involved some sleep deprivation too – but not like this.

The bottom line is that I am bitchy much of the time – I do not have the energy I used to have and I feel like I am in survival mode.  Compound that with excessive caffeine use and there are times when I am downright surly.  So.  I am going to try and start taking naps – especially on the weekends – and try to get to bed earlier during the week.  I push myself to the point of perfection and I do not want to miss one second of Sugar and Spice’s life – the life that I have with them before and after work and on the weekends that is.  But at this point, I need quality over quantity – I feel like I would do more reading and more activities with them if I was more rested.

Onto my public shaming.  I really, really need to lose the rest of this weight.  I gained 65 pounds during my pregnancy – and to date, I have lost 55 of those pounds.  The problem is, I was about 20-25 pounds heavier than I like to be when I got pregnant (thanks to 3 IVFs, clomid, IUIs and depression).  So, I really have about 20 to lose before I am in the “healthy BMI” range and another 15 to lose after that to be happy – and 10 after that to be ecstatic.  Sigh.  So we are talking about a minimum of 35 pounds and up to 45.  I have been yo-yo-ing and emotionally eating (stress at work, stress with DH at times) and it has not been pretty.

I started Sout.h Be.ach on Thursday – and this morning I was down 2.5 pounds…so, it is a start.  Wish me luck.

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9 responses

6 11 2010
sarah

South Beach rocks! It works really well, and seems to be even better than WW at getting rid of IVF weight.
Have you ever tried pilates or TTapp? They are also awesome for moving tings in a less flabby direction quickly.

6 11 2010
strongblonde

yeah, i thought you were going to do WW. 🙂 there’s another blog i read that just started WW and she’s blogging about it and making me want to do it. i feel that i just really like food too much to deal with it all. for me, i usually just have to control my weight by going to the gym. the problem is i canceled the membership. i didn’t see spending 90/month on it when i couldn’t get there every day like before. i guess i’ll have to do something at some point. i was also 20lbs overweight to begin with and then gained a LOT of weight (i stopped counting after i got to 200). no i’m right around my prepregnancy weight, but need to lose at least 20 lbs.

good luck 🙂

6 11 2010
PiccolaPineCone

can i offer you some hackneyed advice you have probably already heard ad nauseum. I find my baby sleeps the soundest from bedtime (8pm) to about 2am, after that she makes much more noise and i am more inclined to hear her (she is also, 15 months, still waking up 2-3 per night) anyway when i am really tired, i put her to bed and then put myself to bed immediately to take advantage of that window of good sleep. i prioritize sleep over cleaning the house, cooking in advance for other meals, etc. etc. can you make yourself go to bed earlier? would you be able to fall asleep if you went to bed at say 8.30 pm?
as i am sure you are aware, solid sleep is super important for weight loss. we feel hungrier when we are sleep deprived and have the tendency to low energy from sleep deprivation with extra calories. so your two goals – more rest and weight loss are very, very connected.
Good Luck! And congratulations on having lost most of your pregnancy weight already – that’s a victory in itself even if you still feel you have mroe pounds to go.

6 11 2010
mo

oh lisa, try to be patient and gentle with yourself. you are getting there – and you are doing so while running on empty, which if you’re anything like me means dieting is extra hard (when I don’t sleep, i compensate with calories. ugh). one step at a time – one pound at a time – you’re getting there. and being a mom to twins in the meantime, which is an enormous task in and of itself!

thinking of you.

6 11 2010
Aisha

Hi there- I thought you were doing WW though? I’m still trying to do it but I think south beach concepts are very important to help cut the carb addiction- which thanks to PCOS I have in abudance.

Don’t be too hard on yourself Lisa- yoer’ doing good- we all get tired and sometimes its just got to come out.

7 11 2010
Kate

Hey, you’re a Mom to twins. No one can expect you to be full of energy, sunshine and light. If it makes you feel better, my FIL was here for 2 weeks for a visit. Between working full time and pumping twice a night (and 9-10 times a day total), I was chronically exhausted. He spoke to my SIL after he got home to say he hadn’t felt very welcomed by me, and I had been “cold”. Really, I just didn’t have the patience and energy to deal with an 82 year old houseguest on top of everything else. Add to that the fact that his hearing aids sucked, and conversation was very difficult. I felt like a big bitch after hearing that.

7 11 2010
Maria

Good luck with your diet. I think you’re a rock star for how much you’ve lost so far!!

As for the sleeping…EJ is 22 months and I have not had a good night’s sleep since I was 3 months pregnant with him. I like to think I have adapted, but if you ask Ed, he’d say otherwise. LOL. EJ is a terrible sleeper and still doesn’t consistently STTN. I recently said to my Mom that I want to get a hotel room for one night and sleep for 24 hours straight. I want one of those rooms with the darkening shades so it’s pitch black and I can sleep in a huge bed all by myself with nobody bothering me. I would give anything to lounge in bed until I was ready to get up (without feeling guilty).

Maybe I’ll ask Santa for a night at the Holiday Inn 😀
Oooohhh…with breakfast served to me in bed!!!

8 11 2010
iamstacey

I’m the same way – the less sleep I get, the bitchier I get, poor hubby. It’s going to be interesting after we have the baby! I fear the woman I am probably destined to become. Like you, I’m going to have to make a conscious effort to put house cleaning and cooking aside and focus on good sleep.
Never have been too successful at losing weight. Have no advice whatsoever!

21 11 2010
b.

Be kind to yourself. Sleep deprivation is a form of torture. My 8 month old twins were sleeping through the night, until we went on a trip and since the return all routine is gone. Being up multiple times a night, and just hearing them make noise makes a good sleep impossible. I’ve had the same yoga pants on for two days and two nights now. It’s got to get better…as long as the babies are taken care of, forget the housework and other people’s demands too. And lack of sleep actually contributes to weight gain which is really not fair. It’ll get better…and you’re not alone.

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