That is how I feel tonight. I got back from Philly last night and had to work for most of the day today. (BTW, getting over giving myself PIO – did it myself in the bathroom of the Philly airport Thursday night – I ended up dropping my draw needle and it rolled under the stall into where another woman was…worst fear…I just reached my hand over and grabbed it and was like sorry – I was scared she was going to call security about a junkie with a scary long needle in the bathroom). Keeping busy with work is definitely keeping me busy and my mind off of this cycle. That being said, yesterday when I was rushing to get out of my suit and into my jeans while the cab was waiting for me, I went to the bathroom and I either scratched myself when I wiped (TMI, I know and my nails have gotten too long) or it was a tiny bit of reddish pink blood from my girly bits. I wrote it off to scratching myself although I did not have time to investigate. This morning at around 9ish I had very, very tiny, itty, bitty bits of pink spotting, literally as if the tip of the finest pen dropped the tiniest little speck of ink on the tp. My hopes immediately went up – that is what kind of implantation spotting I want – if in fact it is implantation spotting. None of this watery pink bright red shit – NO MORE!!!! I wish I was not on the PIO in some ways – I felt symptoms much more clearly off of it, however, I am still having some twitching and cramping and my lower back has a pinchy feeling at times. My nips felt a little tingly a few times today. Sigh…we’ll see – it could all be the PIO. But you know I am hoping, hoping, hoping that it was implantation spotting – the good kind – and my little bean is burying itself in my lining. Is that too much to ask?
Okay, at about 6:00 pm tonight, after I went to the bathroom, I saw a little bit of red mixed with clear mucous when I wiped, then I wiped some more and there was some pink with clear mucous, then it was gone. In my mind, I am thinking red is bad – that is what I was told by my IVF nurse back in the day…It was enough to cover the tp but not enough to soak through…not sure how to describe it. I had a tiny bit of brown later. I am about to google the f*&^ out of it even though I already have – I had “implantation spotting” for both of my bfps and I had some spotting(I am going to go back and look at my post) for my bfn – together with some milder forms of the symptoms I am feeling now. I have no proof of this but I think that one may have tried to implant last time and got started but failed to continue for some reason. The other two, my bfps, they did implant, but I lost them later, the second one faster than the first. I never, ever have spotting at this time in my natural cycles…I am trying not to hit the panic button and chalk this up to a loss when I have not even been proven to be pregnant yet (I took hpts yesterday and today with FMU – too embarrassed to post about how early I was testing here but I was feeling all of these “symptoms”).
My other symptoms include:
1. Nausea – now, this morning and a little yesterday morning;
2. Tingly, almost burning nipples and sore bbs;
3. Poking, almost itchy feeling in my uterus, at times, slight cramping like AF is coming; I did not have cramps during or before the spotting that I can remember…I did have more of a backache feeling after the spotting…; and
Usually, blood, together with #3 and #4 above have meant bad things for me. Like impending loss, period, etc.
I called and left a message with my clinic to see if they can test my progesterone tomorrow – is there anything else I should have them check? Estrogen?
On to consult with Dr. Google…
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Categories : implantation bleeding, spotting
The last spotting I had were the small specks this morning. The spotting seems like classic implantation bleeding – that is what I am telling myself and this link really reassured me…although I hate the 50/50 chance…http://www.pregnancyworkshop.com/Bleeding_Implantation.html
My beta is tomorrow and I am hoping for any positive number that doubles by Wednesday!!!
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Categories : implantation bleeding, IVF#2